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What do we do when leaders wreak havoc amongst the people they should be leading and shepherding? It’s a sensitive subject and has become a hot topic that seems to be happening more often.
To be clear, we are not talking about someone who has ended up in an affair because they have unaddressed pain. That is tragic. We are talking about abusive behavior that seems almost crazy to be occurring anywhere, much less the church.
I understand that pain affects behavior. Shiloh Place ministers to people in pain on a regular basis. People in pain do things and react to situations in ways that don’t make sense, because pain doesn’t deal in logic. For example, people who struggle with intimacy can end up in an affair, porn addiction, or something of that sort if the root source of pain is not addressed. Not very logical, but true none-the-less. It's an issue of our inborn need for intimacy. Shutting down our need for intimacy may have helped us survive painful periods of our lives, but could destroy our relationships if we don’t address it.
For example, I shut down my emotions to survive my adolescent years. When I got married, that behavior no longer serviced me well and became a problem. It was difficult for me to allow God to show me and help me re-engage my ability to experience intimacy in a healthy way.
I understand sometimes leaders can end up in affairs and sin due to unaddressed pain. I have grace for them to be restored to leadership in a biblical way. However, not everyone should be restored to leadership.
Who shouldn't be restored? Those with a track record of habits that endanger not only the gospel message but those under their authority, especially when these things are allowed to go on for long periods of time; ignored, or even covered up by other leaders. Jack used to talk about the importance of character over anointing, we still talk about it. This is why.
The situations (yes multiple) we are addressing involve things that might seem impossible in ministry like texting nude pictures of themselves or spouses to other people and sleeping around with multiple people in their churches or ministries. These leaders may have groomed people to accept and even protect their behavior. This is “wolves in the sheepgate” activity. Sadly, in cases where the immoral activity is not illegal, people often keep what they have experienced quiet.
Sarah and I have discussed this topic at length and recently posted a Facebook Live about it. Sarah has a unique ability to see these types of behaviors even when other leaders seem to be unaware. She can feel the uncleanliness from far away and it disturbs her when she is forced to watch it play out while others seem oblivious. Trisha and I have this ability as well, although not to the extent Sarah does.
We need leadership at all levels that are willing to address these issues, take necessary action, and not be deceived when they see or hear something they know is wrong. Leaders at all levels need to be safe representations of Jesus for people and be bold enough to approach other leaders while maintaining a biblical perspective. Easy right?
Jesus looked out for those with less power. He confronted those in power about their behavior. Think about the woman caught in adultery. Think about the disciples he called to follow him. They were rejected by those in power. They were outside of the system. We should be like Him. Here are 3 things that may help:
A leader posted on Facebook during a recent scandal that "God is Love, but He is also a God of justice." I would argue that “Because God is Love, he is a God of justice.” Justice definitely looks out for the least of these. Remember what Jesus says in Matthew 25? How about Matthew 18:6 when he warns of causing little ones to stumble?
If we as the Church want to show true grace in this season,
we need to protect the innocent by making safe places for victims.
We need to make the Church safe again by not only calling leaders to task, but also removing them from ministry and leadership permanently. This removes the dangling carrot of “restoration to position.” Let’s rather go after healing and restoring them to God’s heart. First things, first. What would be even better than a healthy way of dealing with predatory leadership is a healthy way to raise up leaders. Maybe we could talk about this sometime soon.
Blessings,
Doug
PO Box 4987
North Myrtle Beach, SC 29597
info@shilohplace.org